If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.