just come out here and I will go home with you...
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
