she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
