Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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