It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize