i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
There's even glitter on my cock...
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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