I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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