Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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