Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize