and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
