this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
