hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
