I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
