Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
