rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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