she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
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That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
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This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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