Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
pray to the hookup gods
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize
