I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
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