ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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