Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
