Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
40s are totally the cure
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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