it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
