I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Randomize
