I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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