Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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