Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Randomize
