Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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