Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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