some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I need water and some morals
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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