considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
