brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
