i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
smell my finger.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
