My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
