It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
