Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
