I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
