I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize