1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
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