Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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