You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Randomize
