Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
