My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
