Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
