do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
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whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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