Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
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