used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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