Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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