I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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