I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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