we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
