I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
